I will still be available by email, hey, I can't give the internet up completely now can I??? :)   You are more than welcome to catch me there if you'd like.  Hey Renee and Amanda, I still want to go to the musuem with you guys in March.  Email me!!  bearzfan2002@yahoo.com ... hey, don't make fun, I used to live in Chicago, I made it up a long, long time ago!! :)

Take care,

Amy

Hi all.  I just made a real snap decison to give up my blog and all blogging activities for Lent.  It is so crazy of me, but I know I spend way too much time doing it and I want to use that time instead to deepen my relationship with Christ.  It is going to be so hard for me!  What am I going to do without all of you???  Oh well, it is important enough for me to do it.  I'll see you all in April!!  Have a great St. Patrick's Day, my birthday (3-19), my anniversary (4-3), Good Friday and Easter until then.  OK, how am I not going to blog about all those things???  Have I lost my mind??? :)  Take care all!

Amy

 Last night, as we were sitting down to dinner, I noticed that my tulips are starting to wilt.  It made me a little sad as they had brought in spring, if only for a few days.  Something else I noticed, is that they were all leaning to one side.  I thought that was so curious and so I questioned Michael, "Why do you think they are all leaning to one side?"  At the same moment a bell went off in my head and we both said, "The sunlight."  They were going toward the light, of course.  They will never be "alive" again as their stems have been cut, but they are desperately trying to hold on but if for another day.

Isn't it funny how when God wants to teach you something he will put things in your view that make you refocus? 

I couldn't help but be reminded of my need to go towards the light.  How I need to desperately be reaching for it, no matter what the cost.  Like the tulips, I know that light means life.  Albeit a different kind of light, the light of the world, Jesus, but light all the same.  It reminds me of my daily need for a bible study, which I've been so slacking on lately, and deep communion with God in prayer.  That light means life to me.

I think I'll go do that bible study now...

I was just looking at the weather report and it seems as though we are going to get a break from the craziness.  All this week highs are going to be above the freezing point.  Yup, it's true, and I couldn't be happier.  I think I got frostbite last night on my toesies.    Also, it means some of this snow will dissipitate. (Well, there's a 10 cent meteorological term if I've ever heard one!  Hope I used it right.)

We had a pretty good weekend.  Friday night we had pizza and went shopping at Wal-Mart.  Yes, I know, we are pretty exciting that way. :)

Saturday we spent the day baking cookies for a youth event that night.  We made sugar, peanut butter and chocolate chip.  That was a whole lot of cookies going on.  Of course, most of them didn't get eaten, so guess where they are sitting now?  Yes, half are in my belly, half are on the kitchen counter.  Michael needs to take those to work for goodness sake!

So we went to the youth event, it was a Valentine type thing but meaning love for God.  It was a really nice event and the kids seemed to enjoy it, so that is good.  We go to a really small church in a tiny community where there are other small churches, so the churches have banded together for youth events so there will be more than 2 or 3 at each one.  It's been a great thing and about 25 kids were there.

Sunday we went to church and then Michael took Lilla over to his parents house for the day.  Yes, that meant 6 whole hours of free time for me.  Holy cow, it was great!  I relaxed, took a bath, watched an episode of House on DVD, played with my blog (of course!) and cleaned.  It was so nice just to have that time.  I'm thankful Michael gave it to me.

So that is about the tall and short of it.  Today I need to drop books off at the library, get an oil change and other errands like that.  Hope you all have a good President's Day!

As I've mentioned before, it is seriously snowing here.  The fluffy white stuff just keeps coming and coming and coming.  I guess we are supposed to get another 2 inches by tommorow. 

Well, I have a beagle.  Beagles are short dogs of course.  So, snow and beagles peeing usually doesn't mix.  Poor Ellie's hoo hoo must be freezing because she tries to take care of business as fast as possible and get back in the house the quickest route.  So cute!  Michael actually had to dig a square for her in the field across the street so she could go #2 as well.  You got to love having a dog.

Anyway, Michael was taking Ellie across the street to do her business and Lilla and I were standing at the door watching Ellie hopping up and down with white stuff flying everywhere.  It was as tall as her I tell ya!  Michael was looking back at the door just laughing and Lilla was laughing and pounding on the door just wanting to be part of it.  It just made me laugh.

As I stepped outside of the scene for just a moment I couldn't help but be thankful for all my blessings.  I just had to remind myself of what a good life I have.  We are not people of means.  We have the smallest house in the neighborhood, we drive older used cars and I shop at Goodwill to save some money.  I tell you that just to say, money cannot buy happiness.  Being married, having kids or a dog, travelling to far away countries or being famous will never do it either.  Ultimately you just have to be thankful for what you have.   I need to be thankful for what I have.   It seems to me that when I am truly content with what God has given me, that he just blesses me with more.  My cup runneth over.  What a good God.

Disclaimer: If you are "green", please don't take offense to this.  Much of what I say is in jest.  Take it all with a grain of salt and don't leave me hate mail.  I don't like hate mail.

Here is my case for global warming being a bunch of hooey...

This is my house on a normal February day in Indiana.

Here is my house today...

Any questions???

Appetizer
What sound, other than the normal ringing, would you like your telephone to make?

It would be nice if it was light music, something soothing that never turned annoying and didn't wake the baby.  Also, if it woke me up it wasn't an irritating noise but something that makes me smile.  Maybe the guitar or the piano.  They are both beautiful, soothing sounds.

Soup
Describe your usual disposition in meteorological terms (partly cloudy, sunny, stormy, etc.).

I'd say partly sunny with a slight chance of light showers in the morning.

Salad
What specific subject do you feel you know better than any other subjects?

Social work.  I studied it for so many years, I feel like I know it pretty well.

Main Course
Imagine you were given the ability to remember everything you read for one entire day. Which books/magazines/newspapers would you choose to read?

The bible.  I would love to be able to memorize a whole days worth.  Wouldn't that be amazing?!?!

Dessert
If a popular candy maker contacted you to create their next confection, what would it be like and what would you name it?

Chocolate, chocolate and more chocolate.  Smooth and creamy, maybe a touch of almond or hazlenut.  But, the most important part is the chocolate.  Milk chocolate, not dark.

Look at what Michael suprised me with...what a dear!

Happy Valentine's Day!!!

In the spirit of Valentine's Day and love all around, I thought I'd tell you the story of Michael and I. 

October 9, 2003 just started off as any other day for me.  I went to work, had dinner over at a friend's house and then decided to go to the service at church.  My friend had asked me to stay and hang out over at her place but something just drove me to church that night.  I sat at a table with a bunch of people I'd never met before and quietly listened to the talk our associate minister gave.  I spotted an acquaintance across the room and decided to stop over afterwards and say hi.

Meanwhile, Michael was also just having an ordinary day.  He had been to work and decided to also attend this church service based on an invitation from a client of his.  Michael had never been to my church before, and he had been repeatedly invited to the Thursday night service but because he lived across town he never attended.  This night he just really felt a need to attend.

Fast forward to the end of the service, I went over to my acquaintance, Kenny, and said hi.  Since Michael had come with Kenny, he introduced us.  We exchanged hello's and I thought nothing of it really.  Kenny invited me to BW-3's with a gang going over from the service.  At first I said no, I had to work in the morning and was kind of tired, but after a few minutes I agreed to stop in.  When I went in I decided not to order anything as I wasn't planning on staying and I wound up sitting in the open seat next to Michael.  I thought Michael looked rather young so it never occurred to me that anything would happen.  Something that seems really small that actually stands out to me though is that Michael offered me some of his drink after awhile of talking.  The reason it meant something to me is that I'd just been so off and on with a guy for so many years and he would never let me drink from the same glass.  That seriously annoyed me.  I was impressed that in Michael's eyes there was nothing gross about it, he just kindly offered me a drink.

Anyway, we started talking and found that we had a lot in common.  I thought he was a really nice guy and I had an extra ticket to a function the next night at a musuem so I asked him if he'd like to go.  I was just thinking as friends.  We started talking some more and 3 hours later we looked around and there was nobody but us left.

That night neither of us could sleep.  It was such a nice and exciting feeling.  I was floating on air thinking of this new guy.

When he came to get me the next night we actually decided to ditch the function and go to dinner at a little restraunt in Broad Ripple.  We talked and laughed and talked some more.  It was such a lovely warm night where we sat on the patio and just enjoyed each other.  After dinner we went over to a pub and watched the Cubs in the playoffs.  It was awesome, they won that night and so did I!  Yeah!   Michael was just a night in shining armor to me.  We decided to drive down to a little town about an hour south on Michel's motorcycle the next day.  That was the day I knew I would marry Michael.  Three weeks later we were engaged and on April 3, 2004 we said our I do's.  We never looked back.

Well, here I go changing the music again.  You know, you got to come visit my page every few days or so or you might miss out on a really good song!   I was starting to think about Valentine's Day after a visit to Lisa at Lisa's Quiet Spot today, and I was considering how the world sees, talks about, sings about, makes movies about and just all together thinks about love and then how a Christian should see it.  It's so much more complicated than the passion we are taught to crave (not that passion is bad) and how we are told that sometimes it just dies.  The rate of divorce absolutely astounds me.  Not just in Hollywood, but in real life too.  Too many people are looking at marriage as temporary.  If that is the case, then people should not be committing til death do us part.  Anyway, I digress...

I remembered this song by one of my all time favorite groups, Caedmon's Call.  If you are not familiar with them, do yourself a favor and become familiar with them.  They are awesome!  I've loved them since I was in college and they have just grown as musicians and songwriters over the years.  They write lyrics about real life, questions we all ask and feelings we all go through.  They are just an amazing band, in my humble opinion anyway.  So, Derek Webb, one of the former leads wrote this song about a relationship he had and how Love was different than what he thought it would be.  He said, "As often as our culture tries to tell us what love is, I thought I would put down a little of what I believe love is not. Love is neither a 30-minute sitcom, nor is it a sappy pop ballad. Rather, it is the most difficult and most profound of human experiences, but thanks to our post-modern culture coupled with our own capacity for sin, it’s often much different than we would think." 

LOVE IS DIFFERENT

Well, it looks like five thousand miles broke the camel's back
But it's not as though I had a plan to win you back
Because I don't know what I want
But at least I know that much
Now I'm afraid love came right up
And it slapped me in the face, but I did not know

'Cause love is different than you'd think
It's never in a song or on a TV screen
And love is harder than a word
Said at the right time and everything's alright
Love is different than you think

So I won't expect a postcard from Trafalgar Square
But I'd be lying if I said I didn't care
Because you can't just turn it off
And put a blindfold on your heart
But I’m off to a good start
A continent away, but I do not know

But maybe you're the dream I’m waking from
'Cause I see you everywhere I go
Darlin' you are such a mystery to me, you know

The weekend is over already, how can that be?  It seems like it just started.  Weekends are always so busy for us it seems as though you blink and you miss them.  This one was no exception, particularly because there was so much celebrating Lilla with it.

Friday night I made the most yummy chili.  Michael wound up working really late, again, so I had to use my quality control skills on it quite a few times, just to make sure it was still ok.  It was!  There aren't too many things that I make that I just love, love, love, but chili is one that I do.  I still have some left over so I think I will put it over some Tostitoes Lime Chips for lunch today.  The combination of the two is delicious!  We then went to Lowe's to buy some blinds for the back door.  It's only taken us 2 years to get that accomplished!

Saturday we woke up and made a great breakfast of sausage patties, scrambled eggs and toast with Raspberry Preserves.  Another good meal!  We usually have pancakes on Saturdays because they are so easy, so this was a special breakfast.  Yummo!  Then, we met my parents and my sister's family at Applebee's for a Lilla lunch.  If you have not had their 3 cheese bruschetta penne, you really should!  I'm telling you, all this food was just delicous.  Of course, it had to be finished off with one of their blonde brownies.  Lilla had a bite sized chocolate brownie and ice cream, cute!  Then we just went to the mall to shop and went to Fry's electronics to look around.  That place is huge!  It's a Michael story if I ever saw one.  The man could live there I tell ya.  Well, somehow, we got sucked into buying a playstation 2 and the game dance, dance revolution.  Now we're addicted...crazy!

Yesterday we went to church, came home and took a nap and then went to my in- laws for a birthday lunch and cake with the cousins.  That is always fun.  So yeah, I think I gained like 12 pounds this weekend!

Today it is seriously cold outside and dreary, one of those lay in bed all day kind of days.  I think I will go there now...

Thank you all for your kind words regarding Lilla's birthday.   It really confirms in us once again that there are good people out there that have a heart for the hurting!

And now, without further adieu, I give you the Friday Feast:

Appetizer - Have you been sick yet this winter? If so, what did you come down with? Yes.  In December I had pneumonia and I've also had a lot of asthma related issues.  Good times.

Soup - What colors dominate your closet?Black, white, red and blue.  They are color coordinated in that order.  Any variations, such as a green, fit in with their primary color.  i.e., pink  with Red and green would go with blue.  I know yellow is also a primary color but I think I have one yellow item so it goes with the blues.  No, I'm not Obesessive Compulsive, why do you ask?!?!

Salad - How would you describe your personal "comfort zone"?I am a gregarious introvert at heart, so I do like to be around people, just not large groups.  I am not a fan of loud noises, I prefer soft tones and calming music and colors.  I am more comfortable with the poor or middle class.  Because I've never been upper class and I worked with the poor as a social worker, it is hard for me to understand them.  I really love to be around people of other cultures and traditions.  I don't care for debates so I'm much more comfortable around people who are not arguementative, wether they mean it to be that way or not, it's just a personal preference.

Main Course - On which reality show would you really like to be a contestant? Hands down, .  Several friends and I have talked about applying over the years, the timing was just never right.  My friend, who is a Republican Politician and I, who was a social worker, thought we'd have a good angle going on.   She's actually one of those arguementative types I discussed in the above.  Whew, would that have been some interesting TV!

Dessert - Which holiday would you consider to be your favorite?I love just about everything about Christmas.  The lights, the music, the joy, the family, the friends, the cards, celebrating the real meaning of Christmas and hearing the Christmas story over and over, and of course, watching A Charlie Brown Christmas.  What is not to love?!?!

Happy Birthday my beautiful little girl!!

February 8, 2006, One of the first pictures of Lilla!

 February 8, 2007, You've come a long way baby!!

As many of you know, about a month ago, I met some young women who had lost their children due to a condition named Congenital Diaphragmatic Hernia.  I have really been moved by their stories and how much those short times and "little things" meant to them.  I became very thankful for the last year that I've had with Lilla and so I decided to do something a little different to commemorate her birthday than the usual 1 year old birthday party.  Below is the copy of the letter I sent out to our friends and family for this blessed occasion.

Lilla is Turning 1!!!

On February 8^th, our little Lilla is going to be a whole year old! We are so excited and want to celebrate in a very special way!

Because we have been blessed so much, we want to bless others. We have decided not to have a birthday party, but to do something a little different to commemorate this particularly happy day.

Our family is planning on using the money we would have for a party and birthday presents and instead donate it to the Ronald McDonald house, a home away from home for families of sick children. We are asking that everyone else do the same. Even if you were just going to pay for gas to get here, please consider any donation! If you do, please send Lilla a card and let her know! We plan on giving these cards to Lilla when she is older so she will know that her sacrifice made the life of other children and their families better.

Thank you so much for your love for Lilla and for these families of extra special kids!

Love, The Family

The Ronald McDonald House, 435 Limestone St.,

Indpls, IN 46202

317-269-2247

We've had some differing feedback on our choice, but in our hearts we really feel good about helping other people and teaching Lilla that it is better to give than to receive.  We truly hope she carries it for the rest of her life.

Take care all, and have a great night!!

Today I put a new song on my blog.  Hey, that rhymes.  Anyway, I put an old song by Sarah McLachlan, it's called Ice Cream.  I was thinking about Lilla and all the changes she's brought and the love that she's given us over the last year and I couldn't think of a more fitting song for her than this.  Here are the lyrics:

Your love is better than ice cream
better than anything else that I've tried
and your love is better than ice cream
everyone here know how to fight

and it's a long way down
it's a long way down
it's a long way down to the place
where we started from

Your love is better than chocolate
better than anything else that I've tried
oh love is better than chocolate
everyone here knows how to cry

it's a long way down
it's a long way down
it's a long way down to the place
where we started from...

Now I have to tell you that I have a major sweet tooth.  There are few things I like better than a big bowl of ice cream, almost any kind of ice cream will do.  The only thing better in a bowl is ice cream with chocolate on top.  Yummo!!  Well, that being said, there is something even better, it's the love of my little girl.

I went over to my in-laws today, they wanted to give me a little rest since Michael's been out of town this week, and so I was lying in the guest room watching the Food Network (what's new?!?!) while they sat in the living room playing with Lilla.  Suddenly I hear a babbling brook in the hallway and in pops my little crawler with the most humongous grin on her face because she saw Mama.  Now, I say to you, is that not better than chocolate?!?!

So Mother Nature has once again foiled my plans.   Michael is in Denver for work so I thought it would be a perfect chance to go to my mom's for a few days and hang out, but the weather had other plans.  It is snowing!  And, I mean, really snowing!!  

We are supposed to get 4-6 inches.  Now, for those in places further North or in the mountains, that may not seem like a lot, but, it is for Indiana!  We really don't have a good system in place for road cleanup so it means that virtually everything will stop and traffic will be jammed forever due to the snow.  That really does not make me want to go anywhere.  Particularly to my mom's.  She lives in the country and they are supposed to get 7 inches.  I like my parent's and all, but I prefer to be stuck in my own home rather than someone else's. 

It is starting to get so cold outside my toes feel numb.  I took a shower this morning and I actually felt like they were dethawing...that can't be good.

Lilla is starting to get cabin fever already.  She really prefers to be out and about and the last couple of days it's just been too darn cold to go anywhere/do anything.  She is starting to turn into little Ms. Fussy, not fun for mama.  I really wanted to start weaning her this week but being stuck in a house with a fussy baby you are trying to wean does not sound like a good time to me.  Oh well, what are you going to do?

Anyway, I think I will go blogwalking now and check up on a few of ya!  Take care and stay warm!

Yesterday I was thinking about the changes that have come to my life in the past year.  On this day, one year ago, Seattle and Pittsburgh were playing in the Superbowl in Detroit.  The youth group was having their first gathering to watch the game but, although I am a sponsor, I decided to stay home.  Why?  Glad you asked...I was about to have a baby! 

I knew I was going to be induced on Tuesday morning so my mind was elsewhere.  I did watch the game from my bedroom, but I had a million things on my mind.  What would it be like once she got here?  Was I prepared?  Would I be a good mommy?  Would the labor and delivery go ok?  Did I leave anything undone at work?  The list went on and on.

Pittsburgh wound up winning that night, which we were happy about since they beat our Colts in the 2nd round of the playoffs, and I was induced that Tuesday morning.  However, I labored on until the next morning.  Lilla was very obstinant about not wanting to come out, which is so hilarious because she is a stubborn baby, and they finally did a c-section at 7am. 

For the next couple of days I'll be at my mom's while my husband is in Denver, so this story is to be continued...

Dun, Dun, Dun....